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Chosen Again, Moonshadow Day

by Laurie Klein 38 Chiming In

Moody skies. A cliff. An abandoned stroller . . .

chosen chariot awaiting

Who took the baby?

+++

May I tell you a story?

On August 21st the solar eclipse will, in some locations, turn day into darkness. I wish you could know what the day means for our family.

On this day a year ago, an unwanted child was born to a drug-addicted mother and unknown father.

The parents would not cradle or feed or rock their baby girl.

They’d never be the metaphorical sun and moon watching over her world.

The baby, traumatized by Lithium withdrawal, could not settle and would not eat.

Our daughter, Rachel, agreed to work with her in the Neonatal Care Unit.

Love ignited their first moments together.

Rachel took this baby . . . into her heart.

Irresistibly drawn, she and her husband would rescue her, raise her, and nurture little Kiki into wholeness.

chosen to be cherished

Perhaps Kiki sensed she’d been chosen, because she relaxed. She ate and slept. Her new responsiveness to love lit up the room.

Homecoming

Ongoing drug withdrawal consumed compassion, patience, and stamina.

Even tightly swaddled, sometimes Kiki could not bear to be touched, and I carried her around and around the house on a cushion. As with so many of our solutions, the pillow trick worked but wasn’t foolproof.

Weeks passed. Red-eyed and shaky with fatigue, Rachel and Damon agonized over her anguish. She shrieked and flailed.

“I’ve got you,” Damon would whisper, holding her close. “I’ve got you.”

Is this what it means to be chosen and cherished by God?

To be rescued, again and again—no matter what. To be made part of a family, given a new name.

Sometimes few words are needed. Touch is all.

Kiki’s suffering raged on.

Will the clouds part?

People who follow total eclipses wonder: Is our equipment good enough? Will the clouds part? We’ve come all this way . . . what if the wonder eludes us?

As caregivers, sometimes we miss glimmers of light when our loved one’s pain is vast and their progress, incremental.

We doubt our ability. God seems remote. Hidden.

Who will hold us and say, “I’ve got you.”?

We turn to “the man with starlight in his veins,” as writer Brian Doyle once called Jesus.

Then we offer ragged presence.

Chosen Again, Moonshadow Day

chosen one
“To know even one life has breathed easier because you have lived. This is to have succeeded.” —Ralph Waldo Emerson

Kiki is thriving.

On the solar eclipse we’ll celebrate her first birthday . . . at the courthouse. We’ll witness the finalization of her adoption. She’ll be formally chosen, again, and for always, in a court of law . . .

. . . with all manner of declarations and testimonies, photos and signatures.

Can you imagine the hugging? No words needed. Touch is all.

lauriekleinscribe logo

 

Did it take long to find me? I asked the faithful light.
Did it take long to find me? And are you gonna stay the night?

“Moonshadow,” by Yusuf Islam (Cat Stevens)

More of Kiki’s story here

 

 

 

Filed Under: Immersions Tagged With: adoption, cherished, chosen, eclipse, love, moonshadow August 20, 2017

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  1. Kathleen says

    August 23, 2017 at 5:47 am

    O to know you are loved like that….to be held safe no matter what. And yet we all are held by God in that way. I’m so glad for this celebration, Laurie. And that your new granddaughter is thriving in that love.

    Reply
    • Laurie Klein says

      August 23, 2017 at 1:04 pm

      Kathleen, such a universal desire. I watched “Lion” last night and was so moved by the alternating longing and letting go and redemption in Saroo’s story. Seems I must regularly remind myself God holds me safe, come what may.

      Thanks for sharing our joy, Kathleen. I’m grateful for our online connection and hope to meet you one day, if not here, then on the other side. 🙂 I want to stand next to you in the choir for at least a year. 🙂

      Reply
  2. Lynn D. Morrissey says

    August 22, 2017 at 4:20 pm

    The “mama” to whom I was referring is you. Sorry if I weren’t clear.

    Reply
    • Laurie Klein says

      August 23, 2017 at 1:05 pm

      🙂

      Reply
  3. Lynn D. Morrissey says

    August 22, 2017 at 10:29 am

    Laurie, this so deeply moves me, first for little Kiki . . . for the unconditional love she is receiving and always will from your daughter and family . . . of how the sunshine of God’s love never stopped shining on her, even though the dark shadow of drug addiction and abandonment seemed to occlude that possibility. But oh my, it was temporary!!! And this struck me deeply on a personal level, b/c we invited to our eclipsefest a little boy who has been abandoned by his parents, but whom my dear, dear friend has taken into her home as a foster child to show him the love of Jesus. This is unusual, because she is not a young woman (more like a grandmother to him). But she has a heart of evergreen and one that beats with love for this young child. And staggeringly, this little boy at six had never seen the moon. Can you possibly imagine this?! He was not shown so many things due to parental neglect. And now, he has seen his first eclipse, and the Sonshine of God’s love through the sacrificial love of my friend, just like Kiki has known this through your daughter. Indeed, these are times for celebrating.
    Love
    Lynn

    Reply
    • Laurie Klein says

      August 22, 2017 at 1:30 pm

      “A boy, an eclipse, a heart of evergreen” — what a powerful threesome. And what a wondrous opportunity for you all! Gives me shivers. Sounds like a poem, and a picture book, and an invitation to wonder.

      I’ve read of cultures who swaddle their newborns and carry them outside at night for a first glimpse of the moon, which sounds like a celestial baptism into beauty and mystery.

      Thank you for sharing your celebration with me. So so meaningful, Lynn.

      Reply
      • Lynn D. Morrissey says

        August 22, 2017 at 2:37 pm

        You’ve captured the poetry of this day for me and my family, and for us all, Laurie. Thank you. Ah . . . have you ever written a children’s book? It’s a dream of mine, but not my gifting.
        May we all have evergreen hearts, huh? Bless you for sharing eternal (and ethereal) beauty in this place.
        Love
        Lynn

        Reply
        • Laurie Klein says

          August 22, 2017 at 3:04 pm

          I’ve written a few stories for kids but never tried to publish them. For a decade or so I was a professional storyteller, traveled around to schools, libraries, festivals, churches. Some of my favorite material came from picture books, and I still love them. Loved buying them for our girls. And now I have four little ones and there’s a host of new books to discover!

          And yes to the evergreen hearts. My mom loved a Chinese proverb that says: “I I keep a green bough in my heart, the singing bird will come.”

          Reply
          • Lynn D. Morrissey says

            August 22, 2017 at 4:19 pm

            Yes, yes. That is a favorite proverb/quote of mine!!!

            And oh, Laurie, I encourage you to pull these out, dust them off, and start all over again! (Sorry, I digressed into a Fred and Ginger dance quote of sorts :-)), but yes, you should revisit those and see if you have a story to tell. I think I could write it, if someone would tell me the plot!!! 🙂 I particularly love lyrical books for children, prettily, whimsically illustrated. Books that are deeper than the words on the page. I’m sure your children adored them . . . and mama, too. My mother told me she bought the children’s books as much for her as for me.

          • Laurie Klein says

            August 23, 2017 at 1:10 pm

            Oops, sorry to be responding out of line in the thread here; the blog only allows me so many replies. I think we need a coffee/tea date for about a month somewhere!

            I will definitely revisit those stories prayerfully with your urging in mind. Thank you for being so consistently encouraging. You are a gift to me, Lynn.

            I was always a sucker for gorgeous or quirky illustrations alongside whimsical text. And since I had daughters, and an eccentric aunt who sent money for educational luxuries, a lovely home library outgrew our shelves. I do hope the grandkids will love being read to . . .

  4. Roberta says

    August 22, 2017 at 10:18 am

    The Faithful Light; choosing us again and again and again. Even the darkness is as light to you, Lord. The “I got you” moments have become a year; indeed a chosen life. Thank you for living the hope and sharing the light of hope as you celebrate your precious family.

    Reply
    • Laurie Klein says

      August 22, 2017 at 10:22 am

      Roberta, yes, you distill it all so beautifully here. I so enjoy your writing and the heart within it. Thanks for celebrating with us, friend!

      Reply
  5. Kel says

    August 22, 2017 at 7:04 am

    “To be rescued, again and again—no matter what. To be made part of a family, given a new name.”

    What amazing love and that Hod would offer you all the privilege of being the sun and moon in Kiki’ life!

    Beautiful

    Reply
    • Kel says

      August 22, 2017 at 7:05 am

      *God

      Reply
      • Laurie Klein says

        August 22, 2017 at 8:21 am

        Kel, I hadn’t thought about us now being part of Kiki’s (familial) firmament—just hadn’t taken it that far in my thinking and wow, that moves me. Thank you for this lovely gift this morning!

        Reply
      • Laurie Klein says

        August 22, 2017 at 8:24 am

        I knew what you meant. Gave me another angle on God to ponder as a hod is a V-shaped trough for carrying building materials. 🙂

        Reply
  6. Wendy Boggs says

    August 21, 2017 at 10:26 pm

    Laurie, what an incredible and beautiful story! It lifts my heart to know there are people such as your daughter Rachel and Damon who were willing to give Kiki God’s love when she needed it most. Congratulations on this precious one-year-old today. I will always think of her on my birthday as well.

    Reply
    • Laurie Klein says

      August 21, 2017 at 10:38 pm

      Wendy, hope you enjoyed your eclipse birthday! How lovely to think of you remembering Kiki on your special day.

      We thank God for our kids and their seemingly boundless loving ways, so healing. So like His.

      Reply
  7. Mike says

    August 21, 2017 at 7:10 pm

    I love this so much , it is truly an encouraging message.

    Reply
    • Laurie Klein says

      August 21, 2017 at 10:39 pm

      Mike, it encourages me too, seeing afresh how healing love can be in this bruised and broken world. Thanks for commenting.

      Reply
  8. Melissa Layer says

    August 21, 2017 at 3:17 pm

    This just made my heart sing and a huge smile to spread across my face, Laurie! Beautiful telling in just the way that you are called to do! Thank you!

    Reply
    • Laurie Klein says

      August 21, 2017 at 10:40 pm

      That puts a huge smile on my face, Melissa. Thank you for celebrating with us! And thanks for the encouragement, too. 🙂

      Reply
  9. Carol Hiestand says

    August 21, 2017 at 3:15 pm

    a precious story indeed. Thank you for sharing with us today. I love the visual of being held. Chosen and cherished.

    Reply
    • Laurie Klein says

      August 21, 2017 at 10:44 pm

      Carol, it’s really something to contemplate, isn’t it. Reading your comment this evening after the birthday party makes me relive the day and give thanks yet again. So glad you dropped by. 🙂

      Reply
  10. Gail says

    August 21, 2017 at 3:12 pm

    This made my Eclipse Day so bright and wonderful!!!

    Reply
    • Laurie Klein says

      August 21, 2017 at 10:41 pm

      Oh I am glad to spread this delight around. Thanks for dropping in to read today. Blessings on you!

      Reply
  11. Bev Russell says

    August 21, 2017 at 3:03 pm

    Laurie, How beautiful, I read the words you wrote and just smiled. Thank you for letting me in to your beautiful world.

    Reply
    • Laurie Klein says

      September 6, 2017 at 9:36 am

      Hi Bev, you are so welcome! Thanks for reading. Feels like the more beauty we can absorb, the more we can give away. I’m glad to think of you smiling. May you discover beautiful lulls today.

      Reply
  12. Nancy Ruegg says

    August 21, 2017 at 2:27 pm

    A radiant story, glowing with the light of love, patience, perseverance, and finally, incredible blessing. Praise God for his miracle-working power That Kiki is an adorable, precious baby!!

    Reply
    • Laurie Klein says

      August 21, 2017 at 2:55 pm

      Nancy, our kids continually amaze us. They loved and endured months and months of craziness. These days, thank God, she is the happiest baby. Her smile says it all.

      Reply
  13. carol says

    August 21, 2017 at 1:21 pm

    Happy Birthday, dearest Keira Jean. God Bless you all on this wonderful day!!!

    Reply
    • Laurie Klein says

      August 21, 2017 at 2:07 pm

      Thanks, Great Aunt Carol (and best-sis-on-the-planet). Session in two hours, then the birthday bash at a local pizza place. Oh we are so happy you and the girls got to love on Kiki and Chloe, Landon and Jonathan—our windfall babies. And blessings on all you and Lincoln!

      Reply
  14. larry says

    August 21, 2017 at 12:18 pm

    God Bless.

    Reply
    • Laurie Klein says

      August 21, 2017 at 2:09 pm

      Larry, my friend, thanks for following our story and for your prayers and blessing today. Such joy (alongside fear and trembling) to be entrusted with grandchildren, isn’t it? Blessings on you and yours this day.

      Reply
  15. Angela B says

    August 21, 2017 at 10:39 am

    Happy birthday and happy adoption day!

    Reply
    • Laurie Klein says

      August 21, 2017 at 2:10 pm

      Angela, thanks for reading our story and celebrating with us!

      Reply
  16. Dana Bowne says

    August 21, 2017 at 10:24 am

    Absolutely lovely, Laurie…

    Reply
    • Laurie Klein says

      August 21, 2017 at 2:11 pm

      Dana, thanks for reading today. I know how full the days are at present and so appreciate your voice here today.

      Reply
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