Yes. Those 3 letters brim with promise.
Yes can encompass zest
or solemnity,
courtesy, courage or compromise.
Yes can mean guilt,
resignation,
or quiet acceptance—
depending on when and how and why I say it.
Yes may mean “I’m afraid to say No.”
“To allow oneself to be carried away
by a multitude of conflicting concerns,
to surrender to too many demands,
to commit oneself to too many projects,
to want to help everyone in everything,
is to succumb to the violence of our times.”
So said Thomas Merton.
Then I read this:
“One faces the devil’s bargains frequently when planning the structure of one’s day. How much can one crowd into the day?” asks Robert Johnson.
Violence and devil’s bargains—isn’t this hyperbole? Spiritual hype?
Johnson’s meddlesome “how much” question chafes.
How casually I attribute my productive pace to:
- Personality
- Birth order
- Childhood’s family work ethic
All gifts, I would add … that can be abused. When ticking boxes off lists I feel heroic, almost prolific.
Currently, I’m packing for travel. Bustling ensues. I toggle between fast-forward and pause.
There must be fresh ways to sanely pursue the essential—lest I mortgage my reserves into the next decade.
“Listen deeply to your body’s longings for movement and stillness, saying yes to them in whatever way is appropriate for you,” writes Christine Valters-Paintner.
Discernment sometimes begins in the body.
If amid hubbub I can wait with expectation, discerning my “Yes” may also entail speaking a holy “No.” Perhaps out loud. Perhaps, repeatedly.
The words yes and no even trigger arguments among grammarians trying to classify them into conventional parts of speech. Small and slippery, they can be nouns, adverbs, interjections, even minor sentences.
No wonder I’m conflicted.
While I’m away (sans laptop), I hope those of us pondering this will more easily discern when and how and why we say, “Yes.” And “No.”
Meanwhile, you might enjoy my offering in Jenneth Glaser’s winsome Poetry as Therapy celebration. Daily, for the month of June only, Jenneth features stunning photography, music, meditations, affirmations, poems, and prayers. Click the link below to catch up on earlier posts.
You might also enjoy my e e cummings photo mediation: Natural … infinite …
And this article, by Natasha L. Robinson (especially the list at the bottom)
I’d love to get your take on saying Yes and No. I’ll respond as soon as I can, depending on computer availability.
Conflicting concerns spar incessantly, but I’m learning to let God help me stand on one side at a time.
Carol, that word picture and action you’re taking rivets my attention this morning. The idea of God helping us stand on one side at a time is so encouraging. I’m glad you shared this. Thank you!
Thank you for sharing your thoughts. They wake me up and sharpen my perspective. I need this often for I fade fast. It’s so frustrating so I re read your writings often.
Thank you again
Rob
Rob, thank you so much for commenting. I’m grateful for your presence here and for your support as well as your response—that the words awaken and sharpen your perspective. I find that wrestling the words onto the screen accomplished the same in me, and I do so want to stay awake! Blessings on you today!
Wow, thanks, Laurie for this valuable insight. As a people pleaser saying “no” is very difficult for me but I’m trying to listen to the Holy Spirit’s prompting and I must say, when we ask, He does answer in that “still small voice” but we have to be still to hear it.
Sandi, so lovely to hear from you, thank you. I’m grateful the post spoke to you. Such simple words, yes, or no, yet such an ongoing challenge to use them wisely and lovingly. I, too, am a chronic people pleaser. We’re back from our trip and I’m headed for coffee and stillness and a lit candle or two, hoping to hear that still small voice as I re-enter life here. Blessings on you and Ric!
I for one do not submit my to-do list to God often enough to receive HIS input. At my age I should know better. Thank you, Laurie, for your wisdom here and the insightful quotes you’ve included. Much to ponder and PRAY over! May your time away refresh you body, soul, and spirit!
Oh Nancy, I know what you mean. Me and my lists. How is it we forget something so basic as submitting them, so often? I’m grateful beyond words for grace, ongoing and ever-given.
Thank you for your prayer: We are safely home again, deeply glad for the beautiful experiences we had in the eastern states. 🙂
So much truth in what is said and unsaid here. Yes can be from abundance, sacrifice, sharing, ego, fear, ofr trying to prove we’re enoigh.
No can be from wisdom, establishing boundaries, fear of failure, fear we’re not enoigh…. you get the picture. Knowing when to say yes and no is an underrated skill. One I’m still developing.
Kathleen, more great examples, thank you! It sharpens my awareness. I appreciate you voicing our movements, however small, toward this kind of wisdom as “an underrated skill.” It makes me all the more intent on cultivating it! Thank you, friend. 🙂
Thanks so much Laurie! I needed these words of wisdom today. Amen!
Dear Deanna, my ever-generous friend, I’m so glad the words were helpful. Praying for you today! xo